gold tokens are a joke

Gold-backed crypto tokens, what a brilliant idea! I mean, why bother holding actual gold when you can have a digitized piece of it that you can’t even touch? Have we really become so disconnected from reality that we think owning virtual shiny things is the same as having the real stuff? Real World Asset tokens, they call them. Yeah, because when I’m worried about financial markets imploding, I always think to myself, ‘Gee, I wish I had some digital token backed by a commodity that’s locked away in some probably-not-a-mythological vault’.

The supposed legitimacy these bring because institutions are involved. Oh joy, let’s trust the folks who brought us the last financial downturn to give our digital assets credibility. Trillions of liquidity, sure, if you can wave your magic wand to actually cash them out in an apocalypse. Is it really any different than playing with monopoly money? What do I do when the servers are down or my internet gets jammed by the government’s latest bend-over-backwards-for-statistics dictum? Here’s more on this, if you care to dive in.

Honestly, people, spend your time and effort on something less ridiculous. Like collecting stamps or bottle caps, at least you can hold those and maybe swap them at a flea market for something more tangible like an old comic book or a sense of purpose. Whatever.